part from a-part

What about that crack in your forehead?

Retract your wings while you swear unto life.

Enclose the dirty scraps in that jar, on that shelf, in that cabinet…in our cell.

Feed upon the glass honey, jab those fingernails into the skeleton.

Reveal poisonous gums at my moon-bitten chest.

Drip the notion into my wholesome cavity.

Call the shamans; take out your good leaves.

I am distracted. My spectre is unveiled.The shadow threw away my head and spiked up my tea,

So, I yield to all estates on a string.

It’s been drooled out, sipped up, gulfed in, and I proceed to the midnight slip of the spirit.  

sElEction of breaks and breakings

ouch, head-ache…I’m such a sloth! and such a snail! a 10 year old reads faster than me…and it’s like, I barely put lash on lash that a surge of images and puzzling stories storms in…weird…so there were those 2 boys playing tennis, I was a sorta talent scout and wanted to help them out…but they were weird, sorta retards…but one was cute and my age. the other kept falling into space continuums and coming back…then there was a cat…I just pulled myself awake!

and a one, and a two and a three…

Guess what I’m doing now…oh, it’s wonderful!! -Listening to my old records I made myself a petite selection, just a few scattered  titles, like…Morcoveata-which I’m listening to now-poor kiddo, Laleaua Neagra, Gulliver-cuz I liked the songs and it really has very little to do with the big, yucky story, Legenda florii de rodie…aww…marvellous!So, what’s been happenin’? well…Friday- took the train back home, was pretty crowded but I got a place in a compartment with some characters. First they didn’t want me there, but since I was alone, they conceded. The Arabian tunes flew in waves towards my delicate ears. Was funny that at one point they went crazy for “don’t worry, be happy”. Anyhoo, I managed to get Ilinca in too, cuz she was un-accompanied and had those 2 cute lil turtles that created a bit of fuss. The other 2 girls in there were getting quite bored so they fished a guy from the corridors and gave him the last empty seat. They were quite friendly actually, offered us some snacks and sour-cherry wine. So, that was the train epic. Saturday was shopping day, a long, long day it was, but pretty pleasant cuz my mom was happy, doing one of her favourite things, shopping, going from store to store, seeing all kinds of things. We got a few things, quite cute. Glad she listened to me. Then we went to ikea to look for a bed. Didn’t quite see what we wanted but secretly the attraction was the restaurant. My salmon was exquisite and the choco almond cake-uhm, uhm! It’s not weird at all that before I fell asleep that nite, all the images that came to me were of all kinds of hats, fabrics, clothes and such things.

Oh, the music on the record brings me in the mood for the Huck and Tom detective story. Man, that one was really neat, used to imagine myself in such an adventure and mystery. I remember the perfect setting…in the old bedroom, on the 6^th floor, next to the radiator which could at any time turn into a coffee table and my bro around there, doing homework? Nah…listening with me or…just doing smth…there were no computers and cell phones so it was good, clean, healthy fun. And we kinda knew every line by heart.

“ooo, virtute, tu nu esti decat o vorba goala!” from Brutus. “pe mine, n-o sa ma iubeasca nimeni, niciodata!! -Ce spui, Morcoveata? -afara de mamica! afara de mamica….”

today, I just dusted things around here, anythin to avoid studying…well, it’s just so boring and tedious to have to deal with things that u just don’t like!!! grace knows, we’ve been complaining so much. one of fave arrangements at ikea, super ingenious

a cute lil girl bedroom

in-fuckin’-credible of today…

“You could get starstruck” it said…pretty bohemian and fairy-dustish…but, it’s pretty damn impossible for any star to strike, seen as I’ve been stuck to the sheets all day, one way or another. I actually wonder if I stopped to look at the sky today? gosh that sounds so corny, not really one of my main concerns normally. Yeah, I guess I looked out the window…there was a foggy haze between me and the Unlimited. some 2 heck of nites, the past ones have been…grace and me stayed up late late late…had our 2 hours sleep a nite to write stupid, long, crappy-my permanent dissatisfaction kept gnwaing, essays!! sheesh, wrote thousands upon thousands of words (grace, shhh ;-] we’re entitled to that) and it was as usual so stressing to do it till the last minute, but also surprisingly satisfactory once u’re thru with it. must really suck having to do this all day…guess it’s ok if u got a structured porgram of doin this a couple of hours a day, mayb if it’s ur job or ur passion or smth…after all, my laziness and lil, wastin time lil things have a brighter side in my notebook somewhere. I’m not very sure how stressed I was, now I dont give a dry fig for it any longer but right then…margo sneaked up on me at one point, after I heard some fingers (hers) sorta coming from inside the wall. I was hunching over the essay and turned after a couple of miliseconds and boo! I turned livid. oh, there’s this cool song from gogol bordello-”Through The Roof `N’ Underground” from Wristcutters soundtrack. I’m waiting to get it…neato track. got this weird feeling of being in between…between what I couldn’t exactly say…the experience of actually having something to do for so many hours is…first of all, not my style, and secondly, pretty confusing. I think the past 2 days kinda screwed up my balace. Oh, I do love complaining. no…I don’t but I got reasons, I dont wanna let them go to waste. actually…I ain’t got much to say today, nothing special’s going thru me…but I think my hands got used to typing cuz I could just go on and on with all this boring, pointless jabber…how horrible it feels to be useless to someone. I cant think of good things, comforting thoughts, when all I hear just seems true. the only chance is probably just hanging on, that is, gripping tight tight and trying not to let go of those moments when u either don’t feel anything or u get the slighest tingle of normality, at least content…perhaps even joy?I don’t really see how 2008 is gonna be any better…it started as uncool as ever, mayb nothin particular but I ain’t feeling the hooray effect either…just keeps getting more and more senseless and...dull.

today…